How Ask MetaFilter threads go astray

Ask MetaFilter is as useful as you make it.

Hello, I would like to buy a fish licence, please. A licence for my pet fish, Eric. He’s an halibut. I chose him out of thousands. I didn’t like the others, they were all too flat.

Please limit comments to answers or help in finding an answer.

You don’t need a licence for your fish.
There’s no such thing as a bloody fish licence.
I promise you that there is no such thing. You don’t need one.

Wisecracks don’t help people find answers.

You must be a loony.
He is not a loony! Why should he be tied with the epithet loony merely because he has a pet halibut?
A licence. For a fish. You are a loony.
Look, it’s people like you what cause unrest.